I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
