Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I FOUND THE LEGS
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
