Taylor Swift is so right about you.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
