Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
