I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
you had me at cake vodka
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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