Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Randomize
