Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
