i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
