He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
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