Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
