she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
