there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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