Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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