I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize