Just mADE A PArabola og urine
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
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