Is it because I queefed?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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