were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
