these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
