dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
