How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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