bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
