a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
