You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
