she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
