Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
