In America we eat man semen.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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