I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
