ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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