The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
