I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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