Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I touched a dick in church today
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
