I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
