How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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