come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
