I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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