im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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