As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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