actually, I'm a sock model
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
