I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
