After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
