Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
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