This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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