But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
