Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
