Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
