we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
