I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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