Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
