We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
