He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
All the doctor said was why
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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