do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Randomize
